It was great to meet so many of you at PAX. When a face steps out from behind the username, something magical happens. Forum avatars become actual gamers, and gamers become actual people. There’s nothing like some quality time to insulate us all against an Internet flame war. At Bungie, we love to unmask the people who make games, which is why we take the time to dodge your most serious questions each week.
Here are the living, breathing developers that I crowd-sourced up for you this time.
Lars Bakken, Design Lead
David Candland, Artist
Mike Forrest, Engineer
Zeke Garcia, Artist
Pat Jandro, Cinematic Designer
Scott Kankelborg, Test Engineer
Lorraine McLees, Graphic Designer
Chris Owens, Test Engineer
Austin Spafford, Engineer
Alan Stuart, Engineer
Jason Sussman, Artist
I have checked, and they all have a pulse. That’s all we need to open the Sack.
randomrosso If you could change the ending to any movie, what would it be?
They would never find Nemo in "Finding Nemo".
Alan Stuart
I enjoyed Rat Race right up until Smash Mouth stated singing “Somebody Once Told Me.” Ugh. Way to ruin that movie for me, Hollywood.
Chris Owens
I would change Return of the Jedi back to how it was... but with less YubYub.
Lorraine McLees
Prometheus would have ended about 15 minutes early, with the protagonist looking around the landscape in panic after both ships had been completely destroyed.
Austin Spafford
Unanimate Objec What's your favorite flame thrower from any game?
ALI217 How do I become famous?
It’s really hard to say. The adoring public can be fickle. There are people who are famous for all of the wrong reasons, and people who should be famous but are completely unknown to the world. Are you the housewife of a wealthy person? Those people tend to get famous for doing little more than falling off a log. Short of curing a dangerous disease or penning the next great novel that captivates everyone’s imaginations, you could always commit a colorful crime and become a media sensation. When I was in college, I used to conspire with a roommate about robbing banks dressed as Klingons, and then staying in character at our eventual trial. In the end, we just didn’t have the courage to risk taking a bullet in the guts from the barrel of some rent-a-cop’s gun.
Okay… okay…
The powers that be want me to remind you that Bungie does not condone nor encourage criminal activity of any kind (or reality television). Stay in school and pay your taxes. Happy now?
THE DON WAN What's it like to work with XO Sancho?
Didn't he quit like 6 months ago?
Scott Kankelborg
He makes one fine first baseman.
Pat Jandro
XO Sancho, more frequently referred to as "Don Juan," is fantastic to work with - as long as he isn't distracted by those dating web sites.
Alan Stuart
I’m new, and he’s my direct supervisor, so I have to go with:
Quite Enjoyable!
Chris Owens
He smells like a fresh pine forest filled with fairies and meat.
Jason Sussman
We are but lowly peons when XO Sancho is around. He has helped me ship every game since I've been here. It also doesn't hurt that he's a dreamboat and one hell of a snappy dresser.
Lars Bakken
He is a champion of the Great Dave Uprising of 2012, and one of the key powers of our empire. The Matts (the closest thing we have to a competitive faction) fear us, but are too unorganized to do more than grumble about how superior the Daves are. Without Sancho, we probably would not have our own T-shirts.
David Candland
Editor’s Note: As a Capo in the Dave Mafia at Bungie, I can attest to the shirts. They exist, but I cannot share them because they riff on assets from our next game.
lime013 Do you guys ever have parties at Bungie?
Nope. We work way too hard to
party. If we were to stop what we were doing to
celebrate, you might never get to play the game we are making.
XxShadowDonutxX What do you guys suggest to someone who wants to get into the video game design field?
The
same thing I suggest every Monday. Fetch thyself a beverage and have a good, long read. For as long as I am gagged on the subject of our sweet new game, I am killing the time by doubling as a career counselor. I have to earn my keep with you fine people somehow, lest you kill me and eat me.
HOOBLA 911 How long do you expect these mailsacks will go on?
As long as I am the guy tasked with the privilege of maintaining your conduit to all things Bungie, we will open the Sack together, Hoobla. This ritual might become an aperitif instead of the main course, but that’ll be because we’ll have more red meat to serve up.
antony X1000 Have you ever had any strange encounters with fans? If so, how did you react?
Yes...several. However, I was the strange one.
Jason Sussman
Hmmm, I don't think I've ever had any strange encounters. It's usually just photos and autographs. It's normal to sign moobs, right?
Lars Bakken
I had one sweating bullets whilst I grilled him for the incriminating evidence on his person while his friend fled in terror.
Lorraine McLees
Why yes. During the development on Halo, my name appeared on our web site. Since we didn’t (and still don’t) have a main phone number, one fan decided to go with the first name he could find on our site and look me up in the yellow pages. He called my wife at home, who then gave him my work number. I then got a pitch for a product. It was a pull-down screen with a suction cup that you would adhere to your TV. You pulled it down when you wanted to prevent screen peeking, but it would only work if we split the screen vertically instead of horizontally. Well, so much for that plan. About 5 years later, we heard from him again. He had changed his name to something along the lines of “Clairvoyance Baba Ganoush” and sent us a 3 page manifesto about the end of all time. I’ve been called at home several times since then by fans asking for Recon. Once at 2AM. Since then, I have changed and unlisted my number.
David Candland
The first year at PAX I kept getting hugs. It was actually a nice surprise!
(NOTE: Huggability varies immensely from person to person.)
Austin Spafford
In Vegas, while poolside at a resort and soaking up some rays and football sized cocktails, I noticed a fan with a poorly botched Halo tattoo. He noticed me as well - more importantly the big Bungie beach towel I had. He lit up came bounding over, asking where I got it, which eventually led to him figuring out where I worked and inevitably asking for an autograph. As I was at a pool and not carrying any sharpies or anything, I could not come through on his request. Anxious by this, he got pretty desperate and asked me to "finger paint" my autograph on his arm with suntan lotion so he would get a tan line with my name on it. After a very long "uhhhhhhhhhmm...." of bewilderment from yours truly, I told him to go flag down a bartender and get a traditional writing utensil instead. He did as he was asked, got his autograph the traditional way, and I never went back to that pool for the rest of my stay.
Pat Jandro
Wow. Pat wins. I was really hoping for a good answer to this question after PAX, but everyone was super cool. No one freaked me out, or even smelled bad. I did manage to snap this pic at our lunch in the VIP Lounge in that sports bar, though. If you look closely, you can see everyone’s inner demon.
Its A Mirage What is your favorite lyric from a song?
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name
Alan Stuart
So take me back to Constantinople
No, you can't go back to Constantinople
Been a long time gone, Constantinople
Why did Constantinople get the works?
That's nobody's business but the Tuuuuuuuurks
Chris Owens
Happy Birthday To You
Happy Birthday To You
Lorraine McLees
My soul must be iron
For my fear is naked
Lars Bakken
Can't blame the stone for being cold
Austin Spafford
Llamaboy291 You guys are understandably super-secretive about your work, to the point where you check all photos if someone gets the chance to go through your studio. But how do you keep the people who don't necessarily work for you company quiet, like cleaning staff (who inevitably see secret stuff)? Does Bungie have an in-house janitorial squad for assured secrecy, or a sworn-to-silence cleaning service?
To get a job on our cleaning staff, all you need to do is…
Wait a minute. My paranoia is kicking in. This sounds like the sort of grift you would see in a heist flick, like Oceans 11. I can see what you're up to very clearly, now. You get a job on the inside and play our game every night while we wonder why the floors get dirtier and dirtier.
What I was going to say is that we don’t have a cleaning staff. We burn our own trash in the woods like the Comanche.
Th3 Invader What is your favorite Internet meme and why?
Zeke Garcia
It just cracks me up every time I think about it.
Lars Bakken
Chris Owens
Dog Fort.
Mike Forrest
This is a man of passion after my own heart. Songs about Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll don’t resonate with me these days. You get singing about good BBQ, though, and my eyes start to glisten.
David Candland
DE4THINC4RN4TE DeeJ, will you use this question as an excuse to market the Jobs page here on b.net?
Well, sure! Thanks for the softball.
Bungie is hiring. Tell your friends. If we pick ‘em up, they’ll probably give you shirts and stuff.
ZippingFilly817 When the Bungie team is parted with its sarcasm, is there some sort of contingency plan that will go into effect?
You sound pretty confident that this is inevitable. In my world-view, the scenario you describe is impossible. It would be more appropriate to ask what sort of force could possibly part us with our beloved sarcasm. I would swear under oath that no such thing exists. And, if it does, how could we prepare for such a thing? Were the irresistible force to confront the immovable object, it would likely lay waste to everything you have ever loved. Better to wish for happier things.
Professor24 When times are tough, what do you do?
I get going.
David Candland
Must resist urge...
Scott Kankelborg
I remind myself that I’ve been in way worse situations, and I always manage to overcome it and end up in a better time/place. I do work at Bungie after all.
Zeke Garcia
When times are tough I work more, which results in higher self-esteem and less time to spend the money I don't have.
Alan Stuart
Take a deep breath, let it go slowly. Spending time with family is always the best thing to do when times are tough.
Lorraine McLees
Cry into my beer.
Jason Sussman
I hang out with my dogs. No matter how crappy your day has been, they always cheer me up.
Lars Bakken
I realize things could be a lot worse then get over it.
Pat Jandro
Go for a short walk (when I remember to, otherwise I just waste time getting frustrated).
Austin Spafford
Mostly I find myself spamming the grenade button.
Mike Forrest
pimpsta16 Can you have Marty create more Halo soundtracks? I love his work.
As much as I’m starting to feel a little more at home at Bungie, I don't think I'll ever be willing to boss Marty around. I’ll be happy to tell him that you love his work, but you’re going to have to follow us into our next game if you want to hear more. The trek will be worth it - Marty is getting by with a little help from his new
friend.
GaRrbAGGE Truck What is one thing you know now that you wish you had known when you were starting out?
A programming language.
Scott Kankelborg
The more responsibility you get, the more time you spend in meetings and less time you spend creating things.
Pat Jandro
If you wanted to travel, do it sooner than later.
Lorraine McLees
Office politics can ruin a great job, and office politics are more common than I ever imagined.
Alan Stuart
Don’t Reply All to a company-wide email... especially if you plan on being sarcastic.
Chris Owens
Avatar Korra Can we get an art challenge this time, pretty please?
Solving a challenge can be an art form unto itself, especially when one of our Engineers helps me concoct the riddle. Remember
David Johnson? Well, he was so surprised by the speed with which you solved his last puzzle, he went back to the drawing board. Time for a rematch. Let’s see if your guided missiles can intercept this in five minutes…
9B3E9D48B3A3C99D162D2A75E44FA14A0C3A9261C5873E6D0AB522D2A7
0E4C59D0E2D0A5063CD83524C38332659A51684583522C499663CFAF26A
48A9222C39F366CF9D4294187524C38B067449916B45A5063C59F3A2D38
33A25A8B4A7C5A7527D08B3AA488B26950A53E3D283369AE8F16745A506A
499D1E1CF89166499716A48934E3C59D169419932CC9A7068528B52A59A
F1664C5B1A7D59D122C4A106A548B4A7549F166D0993ECAE9F3AA488B1A
649A14E4C48AB21559D1E4C5934E74FA9667D5A552CD0930E0CC8B3A3C
99D162D2933A3C7A53EAD05D5E2D7A526A45A14A7C7A5066D3AF26A489F
56A4F9D169AE9F569508B3E84C8B127CE9F526499716A488B3AACD85169
2EAF22CBFAF1664C5952445A5160D28B1E94583522D2591E9419D122D29
D566C28B4A9D49F06850996634FA53EAD2AF26659874A0C6A8BA6C1B322
0D0B33EAC4934E0C7A5162ACA11694391067438B667D5831E9458ABABC
883526C1A9522D2A7269D49106A538B5A2CE934E6CFA5160D78B4E7CD8
B524419D3E745AF2664C8B5A2D293360C7933A2C9A94E2CC8D527C28AB
A0CE894E7ACAF161CF8916BC9A9220CDA1322D38B5A2CEA6B274FA93E7
45A6BA3418751D50A53E3D283369D0830E5C5895E4D4914E2D68B3A9C1
A5166CFA5160D78B4E7CD8B524419D424D491668529F1E9419B4EA48835
20D0A132CCF9D169AEB51694F8B4DFD78B3262CAF169D4933265491267
4BA9222D94F4A2C79F3E22EA14A2D4A9668419906A4185322AEAF163D283
4284C8B5E4D4916A2D29F169C19932A488B524CD8ABA2D68B3A74FAEBA
CC5A6BA445A515743833ACCFAB422CFA1322D38B16A488B35FD2931E454
9116945933AA48934E64F9D1EA45B151FD083569C5A93EA4197160CC9F3
A3CC9F3E5AEA11694391067438B52449A7220D385162CE835E4CCB31E0C
D8526A419932A48934EA499B15FD78B3262CA13E649A722A489F4E2D491
2674B933A3C383429AEB33EAC8835A2C19B426459D566C28B4A9D49F1A4
CE88BA441AD169CF9B163559C869D48366441A142CAE
Your first clue is buried in the photo of the PAX demons. Beyond that, I won’t help you, but perhaps themisssinglink will. Post your answer on our
Community forum. Good luck. You asked for this.
Something else you might not have asked for, but will most surely receive, is another Mail Sack. Letters get collected on Monday. You have a puzzle to solve, so I’ll leave you to it. Happy cyphering!